Sunday, July 4, 2010
Here I go again...
Why do I let little things get to me? I have gone and made some people probably want to hate me forever now. I have just had one rotten week and then I go and make an inquiry, that goes south? I feel so awful, I did not sleep but an hour my stomach feels like a pit of hurt and all I want to do is be mad at myself. The worst of it all is this all has to happen this weekend(07/04)! Why could I have just ignored everything. I tried to talk this morning cause I would not have been able to sit through church with this gut wrenching ache in my stomach(not because of fasting either). I emailed them and wrote out a big apology, but I know it still does not make it better. I told them I would tell them in person if they could stand to sit there with me. Does this help count toward me trying to make it better? If my life were over I'd have to devote my end of days to service toward them. I have prayed about it and I feel nothing I say or do will change anything. I know I was told to not be a pessimist(spelled right?), but it looks like someone keeps dragging it out of me and now I get to pay the price. If misery loves company I guess I will keep him company until I can out drown the guilt I have, and what I did, even with an apology hanging out there.
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2 comments:
If you apologize and truly feel bad then if they cannot forgive you it is on them and not you. You aren't perfect and neither is anyone else. People should just learn to accept others faults and quirks. You may just be being harder on yourself than you should be. That is usually the case for me.
I have left it to just that being said. It was just lack of common sense, on their behalf and I am stuck dealing with it.. But after a 24 hr fast/ no sleep, I've decided I will move on. I still feel extremely bad but its life and its not easy.
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